Throughout our lives, we come across an array of diverse individuals. Some of whom may inappropriately exhibit harmful behaviour, belittle our thoughts and question our actions — all of which leaves a negative impact on our well-being and emotional state. The constant walking on eggshells and not being able to express our thoughts and feelings from an authentic place can be exhausting.
Here are 10 characteristics of toxic traits to look out for in others around you:
1. Negativity leaving you feeling overwhelmed and discouraged
2. Pessimism always making you question your actions
3. Criticism undermining your confidence and self-esteem
4. Dishonesty and telling lies
5. Lack of empathy to understand and acknowledge your emotions and perspective
6. Being rude, dismissive and insensitive to your feelings, leaving you feeling invalidated and unheard
7. Cynical and argumentative for no reason
8. Aggressive, hostile and any other tactics giving out orders
9. Manipulative using guilt, emotional blackmail or mind games
10. Self-centered and selfish with a lack of self-awareness
Oftentimes, it’s easier to concede to the demeaning ploys used, as there could be consequences if you don’t. If you must face this person, always be empowered by your own choice and make decisions from a position of power, rather than from a place of feeling controlled.
Dealing with toxic behaviour is consuming, therefore be clear about your limits. These individuals can be charismatic and have a way of drawing you in by being alluring and attentive at first, before the drama starts. Notice the pattern — if it happens often, establish what you are willing to tolerate, set clear and concise boundaries, communicate what behaviours are unacceptable, then withdraw.
You can reject behaviour, requests and people by saying “no” in an assertive, non-aggressive manner. Strength and compassion can co-exist beautifully together at the edge of your boundaries. Meet people where they are and don’t expect change. Come from a place of empowerment and focus on the solution not the problem.
Be understanding, compassionate, kind and respectful, to others and mainly to yourself. Forgiveness and letting go are key components to moving on from the expectation of things ever being different. The past can’t define who you are, nor where you are going. Forgiveness doesn’t mean condoning, but simply giving you the freedom of lessening the grip around your pain and sadness. Do so with conviction and an abundance of self-love. Focus on the way people treat you; it is extremely indicative of how they would like to continue a relationship with you.
Dealing with toxic people requires a combination of self-awareness, assertiveness and emotional resilience. By recognising the signs of toxic behaviour and implementing effective strategies, you can protect yourself from the detrimental effects of their negativity.
Through setting boundaries, limiting contact, engaging in self-care, staying composed, practicing empathy with caution and strengthening your support network, you will absolutely protect your well-being and manage challenging interactions more effectively.
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