Your sibling is your first friend...

Childhood memories are always enriching, and even more so when they are of your time with your siblings.

Life was so simple then with no plans for the future. The dream profession changes now and then, and most of us want to grow up and be like our favourite teachers.

Growing up means moving to different geographical locations, pursuing careers and dreams. Until then, it is fine and manageable. But when one has to say goodbye to his/her sibling, it is a pain that is so unbearable that it can leave a scar and take forever to heal. One continues to live with that permanent silence, in the absence of their punchline, reactions and comments.

One feels incomplete.

Sibling love is an enduring bond, and what makes it so special later in life is the shared history. The places you visited together, the things that made you laugh, the troubles you escaped from, and the laughter and tears that were shared are all important parts of what makes us who we are.

Your sibling is your first friend. This is the person you learn to share with before we step out to the world. This is when we learn that actually sharing is caring.

While parents might indulge in pampering us, a sibling can put us in our place. Yet, when we are out in school or in a public place, they are our cheerleaders with unconditional support. Although at home it could be a mix of affection and rivalry. One can rest assured knowing that siblings are our best critics.

If you take a few minutes to reflect, you will remember how much your siblings have contributed to your personal development. It could be that moment when you just did not believe in yourself, but your brother or sister did not give you an option but to move forward until one day you just became a confident person. That is right; older or younger, they know how to push you out of your comfort zone. That is why they form a core part of personal development and lifelong connections, even through conflict, say the experts.

If you have had an awkward habit, they will make sure they nag you enough to change for the better.

Why is it such an unconditional friendship? Because it is a bond that has been there since birth, and it is meant to last.

Siblings are the keepers of inside jokes and family secrets. They are the support system no matter how many disagreements appear on the surface. There could be a spirit of competition, especially when it comes to parents' love and praise.

Your first playmates can be quite difficult at times, but there is a deep understanding. Some might think it ceased to be, but in reality, it is always present.

It is an essential part of life. So much so that in Japan there is a facility where actors come in to play the role of family members.

Of course, it may not be the same because your own siblings are the ones who know you as you always were. The reason this is so special is that you do not have to explain yourself. There is a sense of security in knowing that someone knows you at the core level and they will be with you in your tough situations and moments of joy.

In a world where more and more people require counselling, sibling love was the best system for emotional support. A sibling relationship, if one is lucky, can be the longest relationship one could have in life.

It is not necessary that a sibling relationship should be a comfortable one, and that is why they say not to take anyone for granted. Only mutual respect can make any relationship survive.

Some of the best elder siblings lay the red carpet to the world for the younger siblings. But we have to make sure we do not take them for granted. Siblings — they are some of the best gifts in the world.

Lakshmi Kothaneth

The writer is senior editor of Observer