Why do people bully?

When it comes to bullying it depends on which side you are at. Some do not even realise that what they are doing falls under the category of bullying.

On GreenMent, Oman Observer Podcast, this month of July we are exploring various aspects that influence lives of teenagers. One major issue is bullying.

Interestingly enough bullying is connected with self esteem. A low self esteem could be the reason for a person to become a bully or end up being a victim.

Laughing at others or giving names and poking fun at them in front of others could all turn out to be funny for one group of people and the doer could win some element of popularity even. But the process could ruin the recipient of this attention.

While sharing her thoughts, Lama Sulaiman, a college student, said throughout schooling and in college she has seen friends suffer due to bullying.

She said most of the time it was to do with body shaming. According to her, many developed eating disorders or change in personality. But they always hesitated to talk to their parents and was never keen to go to teachers or counsellors especially because they were afraid it would be in their file forever, which could affect their career in the future.

So they choose to suffer silently.

Dr Hamed al Sinawi explained that teenagers could even cause self harm. Parents, therefore could be the best counsellors. One of the most important factors a parent must remember is that their son/daughter feels that they can be trusted and will keep it a secret. A betrayal again would mean a new trauma.

As for teenagers, all you have to remember is you will cross this stage too. Make your parents your best friends and cultivate resilience. No one really has it easy in life. If you are a victim, do not remain there. Work at it, overcome and be an inspiration for others. Don’t fall into the trap of being another bully because it is often a set pattern. Instead be the one that makes others proud of you and be the one with empathy.

Apparently bullies tend not to have empathy. But let us not brand them and blame them. They can be helped and the right persons to take them for therapy and help are the parents.

The scars of bullying can last forever in certain cases. With stigma on mental health, most victims would shun psychotherapy. Yet some parents are brave to take the step and change the child’s for the better.

There are, however certain instances where parenting techniques become the problem. A teenager wants the boundary and the space to form their own identity. Soon it is frustration leading to anger and mood swings. Most teenagers ease out of this situation, but some continue to rebel, and at times fall into the wrong company.

Or could there be a chance that these are early warning signs?

Could there be a need for counselling?

These are the questions that are being pondered on the forthcoming episodes of GreenMent. You are most welcome to send your questions and thoughts.

We have all been teenagers once upon a time, but lifestyle was different so we’re the peer pressure.

All a teenager wants is to be accepted and given space to find their true self.