Is a dream job a broken dream?

Do you remember the first time someone asked you, 'What do you want to be when you grow up?'
Most of us would have said teachers, police officers, air hostesses, truck drivers, etc.
Soon it was not a light question, and adults did not just laugh anymore; they actually frown and determine the worthiness of your choice. The practicality matters. And here you are determined to pursue your passion. At that point, we tend to be idealists.
Apparently, there is a cultural shift away from defining identity through work. Years ago, a teacher was held in high esteem so much that it was maintained even through retirement. And of course that was the case with doctors. Maybe that is when the identity began to be linked with profession. There were expectations.
According to experts, 'Identity through work is the process of defining your self-worth, purpose, and personal traits by your job or career.'
There is a distinct sense of pride some people face while carrying the title of their work, especially when they become experts. In some cases, the profession brought them little fortune but undeniable fame. Reputation mattered, and they would take extreme care to protect it from any tarnish. And their children too had to pay attention to maintain that respect.
Then came the era of side hustles where one began to wear many hats. There were opportunities if you were ready to explore, and lifestyle also meant more money for maintenance. The number of professions expanded; on the other hand, there were fewer jobs available.
The question was, 'Do you wait for the right job, or do you take up whatever comes your way?'
Some of the youth have become bolder because they did not feel wasted by taking up small jobs. They felt it was better than waiting and wasting time. Besides, they could start earning however little it is. The more we sit idle, the rustier the skills. And they say the brain is like a muscle, where it needs to have workout sessions. And that goes with skills as well. The more we practice, the smoother the work performance.
Coming back to feeling the pride of having the dream job — the experts say while this feeling is normal, the tricky part is when you associate your whole identity with this role. Actually, that is what it is — a role. It need not be just you.
The situation becomes difficult when the individual, for instance, loses the job. Should the identity end there?
This is known to cause severe stress, burnout, emotional pain, and at times even depression.
We need to. Know our self-worth is much more than our job title. We are not our jobs or our project success rate. But of course, it could be our trait to give our best while working on each project. Should our happiness depend only on that which also needs others' approval?
What we are probably looking for is purpose in life. There are times we feel guilty when we are not working or when we are spending money.
It should not be that, in our social circle, we are addressed in relation to our jobs. Our conversations need not just be about work.
Human nature is multifaceted, yet many of our dimensions remain unexplored. Society conditions us to measure time solely by its return on investment, starving the parts of ourselves that don't yield a return.
The saddest part is when our happiness gets entangled with other people's acceptance of us.
The saddest part is when our happiness gets entangled with other people's acceptance of us.
When we realise it, we might feel heavy, but it is actually a blessing because this could be the first step to untangle ourselves. It can be exhausting when our sense of joy relies on someone else's approval. We are letting someone else judge our self-worth. The goal should be to better ourselves each day. Yes, there are professionals who are never satisfied with their performances, and that is because they have set high standards for themselves. But that should not stop us from being happy. Once again, we have to remind ourselves that there is more to us than our work and other people's expectations.
We want approval because it makes us feel secure and accepted — it is human nature. We want a sense of belonging. But the validation can change because people's and organisation's criteria can change at any given time.
We need to know who we are.
We need to seek genuine self-expression. We need to recognise and note down when we feel we are doing the right thing and yet be aware of what is needed. We may not receive the applause all the time. Most importantly, we should not hesitate to reinvent ourselves and stay relevant by continuously learning.
The question we can ask ourselves each day — 'Who am I?'