Regret-proofing life: Lessons from Ramadhan
Published: 04:03 PM,Mar 24,2025 | EDITED : 07:03 PM,Mar 24,2025
Regret is a universal human experience, a lingering shadow of the past that can haunt our present. Yet, is it possible to live in a way that minimises regret? Both the Holy Quran and Western thinkers provide guidance on how to cultivate a life of purpose and mindfulness, one where regret becomes a lesson rather than a burden. Ramadhan, a month of self-discipline, reflection and renewal, offers a framework for regret-proofing our lives by instilling habits of intentionality, gratitude and resilience.
One of the most profound teachings of the Quran regarding regret is found in Surah Al Asr: 'By time, indeed, mankind is in loss, except for those who have believed and done righteous deeds and advised each other to truth and advised each other to patience' (103:1-3). This verse reminds us that regret is the natural consequence of wasted time and neglected values. The antidote, then, is faith, good actions, truthfulness and perseverance — principles that Ramadhan reinforces through fasting, prayer and charity. By engaging in these acts, we cultivate a life aligned with our highest values, reducing the chances of future regret.
Western philosophy echoes this sentiment. The 19th-century thinker Henry David Thoreau famously wrote, 'I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately... and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.' His emphasis on deliberate living mirrors Ramadhan’s call to intentionality. During Ramadhan, every action is measured — what we eat, when we speak, how we treat others. This heightened awareness fosters a sense of presence, allowing us to make decisions rooted in mindfulness rather than impulse. By practicing this level of awareness beyond Ramadhan, we can prevent regret from taking root in our lives.
Another key lesson from Ramadhan is the power of gratitude in regret-proofing life. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, 'The best of people are those who are most beneficial to others.' This aligns with the Stoic philosophy of Marcus Aurelius, who wrote, 'Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.' Both perspectives highlight the importance of living with purpose and generosity. Regret often stems from missed opportunities to show kindness, to help others, or to fulfil our potential. Ramadhan teaches us to be present in our relationships, to give without expecting and to cherish what we have. This gratitude-centred approach shields us from the pain of looking back and wishing we had done more.
Moreover, the discipline cultivated during Ramadhan helps us resist the common sources of regret: poor decisions, wasted time and neglecting our responsibilities. Emerson, in his essay Self-Reliance, wrote, 'To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.' In a society driven by fleeting pleasures and distractions, it is easy to make choices that lead to regret. Ramadhan’s emphasis on restraint — whether in food, speech, or behaviour — trains us to make decisions aligned with our deeper values rather than immediate gratification. By strengthening our willpower, Ramadhan teaches us to resist temptations that could later become sources of remorse.
Lastly, all cultures agree on the idea of redemption. No matter how much regret we may carry, change is always possible. The Quran states, 'Do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins' (39:53). Similarly, existentialist philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre believed that human beings are not defined by their past mistakes but by their ability to choose anew. Ramadhan serves as an annual reminder of this opportunity for renewal. Through sincere repentance and commitment to positive change, we can transform regret into growth.
Regret-proofing one’s life is not about avoiding mistakes altogether but about living intentionally, acting with integrity and embracing gratitude. Ramadhan provides a spiritual blueprint for this, while thinkers like Thoreau, Emerson and Aurelius offer philosophical reinforcements. By integrating these lessons into our daily lives, we can move forward with clarity and purpose, ensuring that when we reflect on our past, we do so with peace rather than regret.
One of the most profound teachings of the Quran regarding regret is found in Surah Al Asr: 'By time, indeed, mankind is in loss, except for those who have believed and done righteous deeds and advised each other to truth and advised each other to patience' (103:1-3). This verse reminds us that regret is the natural consequence of wasted time and neglected values. The antidote, then, is faith, good actions, truthfulness and perseverance — principles that Ramadhan reinforces through fasting, prayer and charity. By engaging in these acts, we cultivate a life aligned with our highest values, reducing the chances of future regret.
Western philosophy echoes this sentiment. The 19th-century thinker Henry David Thoreau famously wrote, 'I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately... and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.' His emphasis on deliberate living mirrors Ramadhan’s call to intentionality. During Ramadhan, every action is measured — what we eat, when we speak, how we treat others. This heightened awareness fosters a sense of presence, allowing us to make decisions rooted in mindfulness rather than impulse. By practicing this level of awareness beyond Ramadhan, we can prevent regret from taking root in our lives.
Another key lesson from Ramadhan is the power of gratitude in regret-proofing life. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, 'The best of people are those who are most beneficial to others.' This aligns with the Stoic philosophy of Marcus Aurelius, who wrote, 'Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.' Both perspectives highlight the importance of living with purpose and generosity. Regret often stems from missed opportunities to show kindness, to help others, or to fulfil our potential. Ramadhan teaches us to be present in our relationships, to give without expecting and to cherish what we have. This gratitude-centred approach shields us from the pain of looking back and wishing we had done more.
Moreover, the discipline cultivated during Ramadhan helps us resist the common sources of regret: poor decisions, wasted time and neglecting our responsibilities. Emerson, in his essay Self-Reliance, wrote, 'To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.' In a society driven by fleeting pleasures and distractions, it is easy to make choices that lead to regret. Ramadhan’s emphasis on restraint — whether in food, speech, or behaviour — trains us to make decisions aligned with our deeper values rather than immediate gratification. By strengthening our willpower, Ramadhan teaches us to resist temptations that could later become sources of remorse.
Lastly, all cultures agree on the idea of redemption. No matter how much regret we may carry, change is always possible. The Quran states, 'Do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins' (39:53). Similarly, existentialist philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre believed that human beings are not defined by their past mistakes but by their ability to choose anew. Ramadhan serves as an annual reminder of this opportunity for renewal. Through sincere repentance and commitment to positive change, we can transform regret into growth.
Regret-proofing one’s life is not about avoiding mistakes altogether but about living intentionally, acting with integrity and embracing gratitude. Ramadhan provides a spiritual blueprint for this, while thinkers like Thoreau, Emerson and Aurelius offer philosophical reinforcements. By integrating these lessons into our daily lives, we can move forward with clarity and purpose, ensuring that when we reflect on our past, we do so with peace rather than regret.