Friday, March 29, 2024 | Ramadan 18, 1445 H
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EDITOR IN CHIEF- ABDULLAH BIN SALIM AL SHUEILI

To be a teen again...

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Do you know why teen years are so wonderful? When you are a teen the potential is the whole world. Accepted that teenage years are the most complicated time of life. We are saying goodbye to childhood and ushering in adulthood. Parents begin to teach us responsibilities, teachers begin to expect more and more from us compared to previous years. As for ourselves — we are on a rollercoaster of emotions. There is a feeling of confidence and at times there are moments of self-doubt and there are varying degrees of self-esteem. The meter tends to fluctuate when it comes to self esteem ranging from low to even over the limit confidence.


Lot of times families do not realise their child is going through a crucial stage instead elders in the family are more occupied with the symptoms of teenage years. The mood swings are generalised as tantrums. It could be a passing phase in most cases because some of the best years of life are during the teenage years. Scientifically speaking there are hormones involved and by the time the teenager is around 16 the individual tends to ease out and is able to relate and accept others. Maybe it is because by then he sees the beauty of life.


Not all children have smooth transition to being a senior in school and on to college life. This is the age one is trying to fit in. How many times have we heard a teenager declare: “No one in this world understands me?” It is a delicate situation as there are no particular rules to follow in bringing up a teenager as each teenager varies. The age of disciplining is almost over at this stage and it is best to understand and accept them. The best gift to have at this stage is the gift of conversation and being able to be a listener. If the teenager is eager to have conversation with his or her parents then it is a sign that things are going right. They are at the most vulnerable time of their life because their main focus is to find their footing, be accepted and discover their own identity.


While the temperament could run high we must realise how frustrating it is to go through the teenage years. The change the society has gone through is immeasurable. The ones who really know what the society is going through as well as the changes in trends in the society are the teenagers. And when adults try to help and advice it usually ends up being counterproductive.


What they truly want is a good listener and a mentor. The parents need to shift their role and be more of a mentor. After all, it is better the teen speaks to the parents rather than developing friendships that may not be healthy. They are in the process of searching for role models and people whom they can relate to. It seems the best thing then is to evolve with the children so that parents can comprehend what their children are going through. It is period when there is peer pressure that could lead to a variety of stress levels for the teenager. You also have been a teenager once and can you recollect how much time was invested in analysing the image you wanted to have. Probably that is the only phase we invest so much of our time on ourselves. Beyond the teen years we are busy catching up with the world. In adult life we measure ourselves in comparison to the approval of the general public.


Somewhere along we lose the belief we had in ourselves as a teenager. Not all teens have it easy. There are teenagers who are struggling in their environment. Some manage to come out of it unharmed while others take their trauma into adult life at times facing severe complications.


There are times in adult life where we even forget the identity the teenager in us had worked so hard to develop. May be it is life experiences that introduce elements of fear in us as we get older.


Maybe it is time we dived in to find the true self instead of flowing with circumstances.


Do we even realise that we actually have the opportunity to redesign our lives. What would be three qualities that you would need to have if you were to redesign your life — write them down and remember, it takes only 21 days to form a habit. Experts also say personality soon becomes an attitude and attitude forms a habit. But for the inspiration to take that step forward we have to go back to our teen years when we used to feel nothing could stop us! As for the current teenagers, ensure that you enjoy your parents, teachers and friends as there is nothing remotely close to the beauty of these years you are going through!


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