Life experience

Having lived for a few decades now, I realize how life is beginning to make sense. Along the way, I have met so many people — parents, relatives, neighbours, schoolteachers, students, mentors, leaders, bosses, colleagues, shopkeepers, travellers, friends, enemies — all these and those not mentioned; were important teachers on my path even though I was unaware of them. They taught me what love is, how to give and receive it. They taught me gentleness and care. Mostly, they taught me the concern of taking the edge off their harsh words. They sharply and bluntly summoned me, criticized me, abused me, wronged me, twisted me, squeezed me before hanging me out to dry.

In the course of life, I was made to metaphorically travel to the height of the mountains, at the huge waves of the seas, at the long course of the rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean and at the circular motion of the atmosphere. And now as I grow older, I begin to connect the dots.

Everyone, especially those people who seemed like they had been sent to torment me, taught me something. The lesson was actually a choice out of three. If you get the lesson and it transforms you, you end up better. If you don’t get the lesson, you are likely left indifferent, and if you get it and refuse to change, you end up bitter.

As I bring to mind all those ‘nasty’ people I met in my life, I confess that while at the time they had smashed my heart, I now have a burning desire to go up to them, give them a hug and say “thank you!” Thank you because when they broke my heart so many years ago, they showed me this was not meant to be.

They also taught me that I was stronger than I had ever imagined and could survive heartbreak. Their hurtful blow freed me and opened me to a more fulfilling life.

You might be thinking of how your current boss is distressing you by pushing you harder and harder. You see him/her as whipping you. You spend many hours crying at the injustice of it all, and praying for a “better” job with a more understanding superior.

Don’t be surprised if later in life you realize that he/she was sent to whip you into shape. You will be tempted to find him/her so that you can tell him/her ‘thank you!”

We should not think that the only people we really need in life are those who make us sweet and happy. Everyone we meet will give us an opportunity to test our forgiveness, as they will all, without exception, hurt us intentionally or unintentionally.

Almost everyone we meet will test our patience.

You might wonder how many times you will have to discipline your child and if he/she will ever get it. Or you might be wondering what will take your parents to let go of their rigid view of certain things. You might see your next neighbour as being rude and mean and wonder why. Later on you will realize that all those difficulties came to strengthen you for a more rewarding life. It is all in the way you respond to people and situations based on the values and assumptions held. This is manifested in your behaviour and attitude. No doubt challenges will be there and they will be instilled with both senses of difficulty and victory. All you need is to Just remain positive. Have a nice weekend!